Friday, November 26, 2021

Have no fear, the December ish is here!

It's another December to dismember at The Last Word, as our December ish is now pub!

This ish talks about  a "magic kidney", a crude map of Sesame Street, a person crinkling a candy bag at a play, a Sarah Palin look-alike chewing bubble gum, and more!

So roo and poo...

If that doesn't work, bip your beeper here...

Sunday, November 21, 2021

Drawing the line

All over America and around the world, people have fought for justice. If one is innocent of a crime, judges and juries must acquit. If one is guilty beyond a reasonable doubt, a conviction must result. I am not in a position to weigh the facts of every case, and I can only hope jurors and judges reach the right verdict. This blog entry is not a commentary on the outcome of a particular case, regardless of how we may feel about it. There is another issue at play that poses a major threat to Americans' civil liberties, and I want to make sure everyone is warned of it, so they're not caught off guard.

If you can endure even one second of the media's coverage of major news events lately, you may have noticed a lot of media attention focused on whether a defendant crossed a state line. I don't think the media was desperately trying to convict the defendant. Rather, I think the media is more interested in the long game of preparing us for a looming "papers please" dystopia.

What is the significance of state lines? Some state lines aren't even based on visible features but were arbitrarily mapped out. Why would lines that are largely invisible determine a defendant's guilt or innocence? The media cares about state lines because it lays the groundwork for the day when crossing a state line will require all of us to submit papers or undergo a search.

There's pretty convincing evidence that this is their goal. It was happening already during the full lockdowns last year. There were orders prohibiting or limiting interstate travel even into this year. There were even checkpoints between states. I heard from family of a checkpoint between Ohio and Indiana. New Mexico decreed that state parks were closed to out-of-state residents. Albuquerque's bus system was open only to New Mexico residents, and it even checked passengers' ID's. Even federal orders on things like masks refer only to interstate travel.

The priority of our pundit class is a permanent police state. The state line obsession encourages the public to accept limits on interstate movement.

I'm kind of big on all this civil liberties business, you know.

Tuesday, November 2, 2021

GOP retakes Virginia governorship

Oh no!


Monday, November 1, 2021

Bill would require social media sites to verify your identity

I had no idea this was 1998.

As Big Tech book-burning continues unabated, it does of course have its enablers in Congress. Among them is Rep. John Curtis (R-Utah), who is floating a draft plan to require social media websites to verify users' identity.

This will gut the anonymity vital for many users. Anonymity isn't just for right-wing churches and the Chinese Communist Party flooding newspaper comment sections with gobs of sockpuppets. Anonymity is also important for people who seriously discuss sensitive topics. It also protects those who blow the whistle on government or corporate scandals. And it protects other folks who may desire extra privacy.

Under Curtis's proposal, people would be prevented from creating accounts on Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, or any similar site from making an account unless they submit identification. It's a "papers please" law for the Internet.

Furthermore, these websites would be required to report users to the Federal Trade Commission if they are suspected of using phony ID's. The FTC would be required to submit these reports to the Department of Justice.

America isn't the only land were there are proposals like this. The dictatorship in Australia has a similar plan.

It's like the Communications Decency Act, Real ID, the Patriot Act, the Social Credit System, and vaccine passports all rolled into one.

Saturday, October 30, 2021

Have no fear, the November ish is here!

It's a November to dismember with The Last Word!

This ish talks about my misadventure-filled New Mexico trip, high school kids stealing globes, a restaurant kicking kids out for squirting ketchup on the TV, mischief at Vermont schools, and more! It's not sold in any store!

So point your pooper here...

If that doesn't work, bip on over here...

Saturday, October 23, 2021

Fauci questioned over puppy experiments

Dr. Anthony Fauci has become the face of America's botched pandemic response and now serves as President Biden's chief medical adviser. Now a letter from members of Congress is demanding answers from Fauci over unspeakably cruel experiments on puppies.

The letter is from a bipartisan group of House members - but mostly Republicans, because the Democrats are becoming not only the party of child abuse but also of cruelty to animals. This comes after the White Coat Waste Project - the nonprofit that found U.S. taxpayer dollars were funding the Wuhan Institute of Virology - have exposed experiments that infected numerous puppies with dangerous parasites.

The White Coat Waste Project said 44 beagle puppies were abused in a lab in Tunisia, and some even had their vocal cords removed so barking wouldn't upset scientists there. Under Fauci, the NIH sent a huge sum of American taxpayer money to the lab for these experiments.

There is no justification whatsoever for this cruelty, and even the FDA said it was not necessary.

We live in an era in which so-called conspiracy theories are actually spoilers. Remember "America is fast becoming a police state"?

Thursday, October 21, 2021

Minor road photos from August posted

I went on a very minor Roads Scholaring locally in August, and the event yielded only 6 photos. This justifies peepage...

Wednesday, October 20, 2021

Wind Cave! Carhenge! Game day bucket go boom!

Back in June, I goed on a little road trip to Wind Cave National Park in South Dakota. This is the trip where a woman appeared to be trying to blow a bubble with the drawstring of her jacket. The trip yielded 213 photos of Roads Scholaring interest, and you're gonna peep 'em until your face flies off in public...

Monday, October 18, 2021

New Mexico governor pays $150K in crotch grabbing incident

It's nice to know that the Governor of New Mexico is a complete idiot.

Gov. Michelle Lujan Grisham, a Democrat, is known for her ranting harangues and giving New Mexico one of the worst responses to the COVID-19 pandemic. It turns out that a former campaign spokesman accused Lujan Grisham of a bizarre incident at a campaign staff meeting. According to this allegation, Lujan Grisham dumped water all over the man's crotch and then grabbed his crotch during the meeting.

Now Lujan Grisham has settled the resulting harassment claim for $150,000.

Lujan Grisham tried to hide this payment by making it appear on campaign finance reports to be ordinary legal expenses.

What a beezweezer.

Saturday, October 16, 2021

CCP joins War on Halloween

The Religious Right used to fight against Halloween year after year. These pushy fanatics used to cancel Halloween in schools all over America. In some schools, Halloween never returned.

But now we're facing new enemy combatants in this War on Halloween. The stated reason is not COVID-19, nor is it under the same guise as the battles of previous decades. Rather, it seems to be simply...because.

Schools in Seattle; East Lansing and Grand Ledge, Michigan; and Princeton, New Jersey, recently decided to cancel all Halloween festivities. They say Halloween events create too much noise. They say Halloween is too exciting, and that this impedes the learning environment. They say canceling Halloween will somehow increase attendance. They point out that not everyone celebrates Halloween - which is true, but there's also a lot of people who don't celebrate other events. When I was in school, I had no interest in school sports or dances, but I didn't ask for these events to be canceled. When I was a high school junior, a school pal said he did not celebrate Thanksgiving. We all respected that and moved on. The school did not cancel the holiday. School officials also say Halloween wreaks havoc on people with food allergies. I'm very sensitive to a wide variety of foods, but I wouldn't dream of abolishing Halloween because of it.

Halloween doesn't violate the spirit of inclusion or the mission of education any more than most other things that schools do - and take pride in.

At the New Jersey school, officials reversed their decision to ban Halloween, but schools elsewhere are doubling down. One is replacing Halloween with "thematic units of study about the fall." There are even rumblings that cities might ban Halloween even outside of school.

This has the Chinese Communist Party's fingerprints all over it. It has become clear since last year that our overlords either support the CCP outright or are willing to do its bidding. In addition to executing the War on Halloween, they have one thing in common with the right-wing religious zealots who have fought us in the past: They are not patriots. Appeasing a hostile foreign dictatorship is not what I call patriotism. We can also abandon any pretense that our rulers are liberal. Liberal Democrats such as George McGovern and Walter Mondale were staunchly opposed to authoritarian regimes, including those that claimed to be communist.

If the CCP wanted to intentionally gunk up our society, an effective way to do it would be to advance the War on Halloween. To the CCP, this is dynamite.

The idea that our "leaders" are vanguards of liberality is a complete joke. Their totalitarian, selfish policies lately strongly resemble juche - North Korea's official ideology. But they have some elements of the Taliban and Nazi Germany thrown in.

It's 100% fair to lump the nobility that runs our school systems in with the Religious Right - because they share the exact same goal of banishing Halloween from our communities. If the jackboot fits, wear it. And if it feels good, put it on.

Land of Enchantment enchants!

Yesterday I got home from a camping trip to New Mexico.

It's obligatory for me to mention here that I saw a Florence Henderson look-alike there.

It's also a requirement that I mention that I saw a Cathy Lee Crosby look-alike there.

And it's absolutely mandatory that I mention the fact that a couple at the campsite kept loudly passing gas and laughing uncontrollably about it.

These events elicit little elaboration. But this road trip was one hilarious misadventure after another, and I plan to go into hairy detail about the trip in the November issue of The Last Word.

Tuesday, October 5, 2021

Patriot Act may be unleashed against school dissidents

Things that trigger a government investigation: parents and students disagreeing with school boards.

Things that don't trigger a government investigation: schools launching a years-long harassment campaign against a student.

The Nazism of America's schools has been on full display of late, and plenty of families are furious. And make no mistake, our schools are run by actual Nazis. I don't mean that in a figurative sense. If this was Germany in the 1930s, they would be card-carrying members of the Nazi Party. To be clear, they are not progressive.

Some folks are fighting back. The current regime of bio-juche has made activists out of families who never had any interest in activism before. Yet as far as I know, these families have committed no violence or crimes. Media reports imply that there has been a rise in threats against school boards and administrators. But that is a lie. It is a fabricated crisis.

Education Week now reports that the National School Boards Association is begging the Biden administration to launch an investigation of these dissidents, accusing them of "domestic terrorism." The NSBA cites - of all things - the Patriot Act. The NSBA is asking the Department of Homeland Security to get involved.

With the Patriot Act and the DHS being pressed into service, it's like having Bush back in power!

U.S. Attorney General Merrick Garland coddled the NSBA's deranged conspiracy theory by sending a memo to the FBI director about dissenters' nonexistent "criminal conduct."

The Biden administration is worse than Nixon, and it's not even close. In addition to all this stupidity, the administration has also been encouraging lawbreaking by school districts and openly giving them taxpayer dollars to break the law. For a presidential administration to openly condone lawbreaking is unprecedented in America's history. Even Watergate wasn't this bad. Maybe even the Iran-Contra scandal. When I registered as a Democrat when I was 18, I didn't know I signed up to become a fascist. But America today is truly fascist.

Monday, October 4, 2021

LinkedIn censors profiles to appease CCP

In recent days, LinkedIn has been notifying American journalists that it is blocking their profiles to appease the Chinese Communist Party.

LinkedIn is informing them that "your profile and your public activity, such as your comments and items that you share with your network, will not be made viewable in China." The company is not specifying what content is so offensive.

You read that right. An American company is censoring Americans to appease a foreign dictatorship.

Stories like this aren't completely new. Big Tech has sided with foreign dictators before. I recall a wave of Big Tech censorship in the late '90s or so, some of which was designed to please authoritarian regimes abroad. And who could forget Yahoo turning in journalists to the Chinese government?

More recently, Apple, Google, and YouTube have caved to overseas censors' demands.

The Democrats are furious. Wait, no, they're not. That would be the 1991 Democrats. The 2021 Democrats don't care, because they hate America.

LinkedIn issued a statement declaring, "We're a global platform that respects the laws that apply to us, including adhering to Chinese government regulations for our localized version of LinkedIn in China." Then what about following American laws in America? The U.S. used to look dimly on antitrust violations and against common carriers policing content.

The treason by Big Tech and the Democrats isn't a problem we can just bubble away.

Friday, October 1, 2021

Bitter gum face! (Bubble Gum Weekend)

Let's reflect back on some TV commercials circa 1997!

You may remember the Keystone beer commercials in which the cooltagonist would display "bitter beer face." Well, this is a commercial from that same era for Extra sugarless gum in which a woman seems to have "bitter gum face"...

Here's a synopsis of that commersh in case you're afraid an exploding cigar will pop out of your computer screen. A woman is standing on a rocky beach with other tourists - in order to see a whale jump out of the sea, a once-in-a-lifetime event. She crams a stick of the competitor's gum - you could tell it's Trident - into her mouth.

But the gum is so nasty that she needs another piece after just a few seconds. The look on her face is like the "bitter beer face" in the Keystone ads. So she starts pawing around in her bag for another stick. Just then, the whale pops up - and she misses it!

She waited her whole life to see the whale, and inferior gum caused her to miss it!

On the boat on the way back, she sulks because she missed the whale!

But nobody bubbled.

Mike DeWine look-alike sighted at airport

I've received an e-mail declaring that a Mike DeWine look-alike has been seen at the underground train at the Cincinnati airport. He was said to have strongly resembled the diminutive right-wing Governor of Ohio.

Thursday, September 30, 2021

Have no fear, the October ish is here!

Imagine being cool.

Along with that, imagine sitting on the edge of your seat for the October issue of The Last Word. Well, the wait is over!

This ish talks about my Fernandina Beach trip, people drinking beer on the Cincinnati streetcar, accidentally brewing wine from apple juice, Hawaiian Punch bubble gum, 'Sesame Street' cereal, people selling garbage at yard sales, and more!

So point your pooper here...

If you can't read it on Scribd, you may find it here...

Monday, September 27, 2021

Butbutbut what about your sources?

A few words about sources for this blog's entries are in order. I don't mean humorous entries like "A Peter Cetera look-alike bubbled at Olive Garden." I mean serious news items.

This blog used to contain a lot more entries, and most were serious stories. Little by little, I stopped linking to various major news outlets, because they so clearly had a right-wing bias. After a few years, I don't think I even linked to any of America's over-the-air networks, and I think I stopped linking to CNN because it ran a discredited tabloid story claiming a mass shooter was a leftist. Now I very rarely link to any major media at all.

Lately, a few people have criticized me for not trusting major media, even as I quote Twitter blurbs from individuals. The people I follow on Twitter are more trustworthy than major media. Since the pandemic began, I've caught major media in lie after lie, designed to advance their bizarre fetish for continued COVID lockdowns and lockdown culture. Some of the media's statements were demonstrably false, and they also broke their promise that restrictions would be eased when we met certain goals.

I was assailed because the people I read on Twitter supposedly don't have the credentials the media has. That's simply not true. Some of them are statisticians who have advanced degrees, and most of their information is raw numbers, not editorial content that lets them twist things around. One of the best sources for COVID information is an accomplished public defender who became a civil liberties attorney. Two other sources are teachers in the San Francisco Bay Area. Others are doctors and epidemiologists.

They are not conspiracy theorists. The real conspiracy theorists are those in the media who actually claimed with a straight face that states were deliberately undercounting COVID deaths just so they'd have an excuse to lift lockdowns. Democrats and Republicans alike have been the target of this conspiracism - just as both parties were also lockdown perpetrators.

CNN and MSNBC keep whipping up fear among viewers who have become addicted to media fearmongering. These channels are as bad as Fox News was after 9/11. People have lost loved ones to these channels, as they lost others to Fox some 20 years ago. The FCC needs to step in and hold these channels accountable.

It is credentialism to claim that individuals on Twitter count less than established news sources. But it falls flat when you point out these Twitter folks have credentials that are just as strong as those of anyone else.

Sunday, September 26, 2021

A person bubbled at Kroger

Today at Kroger, some woman bubbled.

Sunday, September 19, 2021

Ploppings! Vomiting! Beer! Game day bucket go boom!

This weekend is Cincinnati's Oktoberfest - or, as I call it, Ploptoberfest.

After the city reduced the space for Ploptoberfest to make way for the dumb streetcar and then lied about it, I figured I'd start avoiding the event. But after last year's shitshow, I decided to give Ploptoberfest another chance.

This year was barely worth it for me, because I apparently have another gallbladder infection that spoiled the day, or I'm feeling the result of being stabbed by a sea urchin during last week's Florida trip. Some aspects of Ploptoberfest are starting to improve again, but they still haven't gotten anywhere near the glory of a decade ago. A lot of this is more Last Word material than 'Pail material, but I'll give a rundown of yesterday's events.

People plopped stuff. I noticed someone had put a plastic Hawaiian Punch bottle in the toilet. Later, I saw that someone had put a plastic Kroger bag in the toilet.

I threw up because of the suspected gallbladder infection.

I noticed that people were drinking beer on the streetcar - in stark violation of an Allowed Cloud.

Also, some woman was in a festive enough mood that she bubbled a humongous bub.

Gum Fighter takes on Alice Cooper (Bubble Gum Weekend)

Sorry to report the death at age 92 of Don Collier, Western actor who played the Gum Fighter in the Hubba Bubba bubble gum commercials of the 1970s and 1980s.

In a media interview, Collier said he really didn't like blowing bubbles with bubble gum. Yet bubble he did. Some of these Wild West-themed commercials had to be filmed in Australia so they could air in that country. Collier said in another interview that he had to travel to Australia twice to film the ads. But he liked Australia so much that he visited 6 more times. (That was before Australia became the military dictatorship it is today.) Some of the ads though were filmed in Arizona.

A Hubba Bubba commersh from 1981 showed the Gum Fighter getting into a bubble bustin' battle with an Alice Cooper look-alike...

The Gum Fighter's adversary in that ad was played by the late Timothy Carey. A website once reported that Carey didn't know how to blow a bubble until he was hired to appear in the ad, and that his daughter had to show him how.

But the Gum Fighter won the showdown with Alice Cooper, and at the end of the ad, Collier's character declared, "Big bubbles, no troubles!" Then he laughed in a manner similar to Shadoe Stevens.

These commercials will live on as long as they dare!

Wednesday, September 8, 2021

Ohio mayor suspected of taking bribes from contractor

These days, only one thing seems to be worse than Ohio Republicans: Ohio Democrats.

On policy stances, they're practically the same thing now. And they're both corrupt.

In Dayton, Ohio, Mayor Nan Whaley - a leading Democratic candidate for governor - was suspected by the FBI of accepting a bribe from a demolition contractor. The contractor was also suspected of bribing other public officials. The alleged events took place in 2013-14.

The FBI said the contractor often threatened to "call the mayor" regarding a variety of situations. He told an informant he gave Whaley $50,000 in cash.

If that's really what happened, this isn't cool, Dems.

Sort of like the school closing fiasco.

Monday, September 6, 2021

Rip-off-fest is back! (Circus Vargas, Circus Vargas!)

Yesterday was annual soft drink smuggling day - also known as Riverfest.

I snuck Pepsi into the festival - in defiance of their timeworn rule against bringing in beverages. I didn't get to do it last year because of all the stupid, but everything was back to normal this year!

Among those watching the fireworks from the Newport floodwall, there was some kid who was about 10 years old who had a huge column of snot dangling from his nose!

Also, a young woman walking along Dave Cowens Drive in front of the floodwall was in such a festive mood that she bubbled.

Wednesday, September 1, 2021

Someone bunkerooed again

Last night at a small family gathering, someone released an SBD bunkdoodle.

Tuesday, August 31, 2021

Buyer's remorse

I gave them a second chance (which they didn't deserve). They blew it.

The Democrats abandoned America once before, back in the '90s when they let the DLC take over. But later I thought they had crushed that Coke can, so I thought it was safe to vote for them again. Man, was I ever wrong!

I regret voting for Andy Beshear, thanks to his increasingly dictatorial demeanor and lies. I would have been better off voting for the Libertarian. I even regret voting for Democrats when I first voted in the early '90s when they were better, because that has only encouraged them now. I was a member of the Young Democrats in college, and I never would have joined if I had foreseen the current disaster.

When I used to warn everyone about the dangers of America becoming the hopeless dictatorship it is now, I always thought the Republicans would be the bigger culprit. I am absolutely shocked that the Democrats did more to establish a police state in the past 18 months than the Republicans did in the 40 years before. This is inexcusable.

It's not just familiar domestic issues but also international issues like the drone strike that killed all those children in Kabul.

My stance is not an amicable break with the Democrats. It also puts into perspective some of their scandals over the past couple years. For example, they had a series of scandals in another state a couple years back, and I felt at the time that I should give them the benefit of a doubt unless new evidence emerged. Now I'm pretty sure that the politicians who were involved actually did do the things they were accused of doing. I have a more open mind now so I can weigh the evidence more accurately.

The Democratic "leadership" should not be considered progressive, but if they claim to be, they need to turn in their progressive card. They have become outright fascist.

Monday, August 30, 2021

Newsom praises pro-CCP news outlet

As the recall election for that lying piece of shit Gavin Newsom approaches, he has a new scandal to worry about.

This month, Newsom attended a gala honoring Sing Tao News - a newspaper publisher aligned with the Chinese Communist Party. Newsom said the outlet practices "journalistic integrity" and offers "balanced news stories."

Sing Tao is registered as a foreign agent of China and is owned by members of a CCP-controlled board. Sing Tao's chairman has praised a Chinese law that has been used to arrest pro-democracy journalists and activists in Hong Kong.

Besides Newsom, other California Democrats - including embattled San Francisco Mayor London Breed - also spoke at the Sing Tao gala.

The Governor of California is a supporter of the Chinese Communist Party.

Kabul family dead after U.S. bombing

Under the DLC child abusers, America's rulers are back in the child killing business!

Today, it was reported that 10 members of the same family - including 8 children, some as young as 2 - were killed when a U.S. drone carpet-bombed a residential neighborhood in Kabul.

The U.S. called this a defensive strike. That's a lie.

The victims' relatives spent the day at a hospital identifying the charred remains.

I can't say I didn't get fair warning about the ghouls who did this - even if I hoped against all hope nothing like this would happen. Diehard readers of this blog were on top of things regarding the nature of the monsters who did this. The DLC's evil nature is now on display for all to see.

And that doesn't even count their monstrous and lawless domestic policies lately. The Biden regime makes the Nixon administration look like a smashing success in comparison.

Have no fear, the September ish is here!

Ba-de-ya! It's time for the September issue of The Last Word!

As America collapses, The Last Word still trudges along after 28 years! This ish talks about my Roanoke trip, kids putting dog-doo in Little Free Libraries, college students drinking beer in class, people sticking their vaccine cards on a gum wall, encyclopedia volumes getting lost, and more!

So point your pooper here...

If that doesn't work, slink on over here...

Sunday, August 29, 2021

You're gonna bubble after all... (Bubble Gum Weekend)

This occasional feature usually talks about specific gum commercials. But this is one that apparently never aired.

A few years ago, someone made a spoof of the opening sequence of 'The Mary Tyler Moore Show' - the popular 1970s sitcom. This spoof was designed as an ad for Care-Free gum - one of the most widely ridiculed brands of beegee among gum connoisseurs.

If not sure if Care-Free is still available, so instead of embedding the video and giving free ad space to a product that may still exist, I'll post a link to it Out Of An Abundance Of Caution (tm)...

In that commersh, an actress portraying Mary Tyler Moore chomps a big ol' wad of gee. She even bubbles a couple times - in public, no less! Countless people witnessed these bubs.

No 'Supertrain' or 'Me & Mrs. C' spoofs appear imminent.

Tuesday, August 24, 2021

Another Michael McDonald look-alike sighted

Early today, I received an important e-mail declaring that a Michael McDonald look-alike was sighted at a bar on Saturday.