School accuses students of cheating on drug tests

You can't make this shit up, people!

If only 7 students out of 900 in your high school test positive for drugs, I'd say your school doesn't have any more of a drug problem than most other places.

But in Cache County, Utah, school officials somehow interpret this as a sign that the other 893 kids cheated.

So the school is saying they cheated just because the tests didn't yield the results that the school expected? That's just about the dumbest thing I've ever heard of.

This is exactly like when the media (especially scumbag rags like Campus Report) began playing up the nationwide grade inflation hoax. Under this idiotic meme, if students' grades went up, the right-wing media acted as if it was because schools gave them a free pass. (Yet the media has ignored the real grade inflation that benefits star athletes.)

To hear the system tell it, if you succeed, it's because you cheated. If you fail, it's because you deserve it. Imagine being subjected to an environment in which you're bombarded with constant messages like this calling you either a failure or a cheater (depending on your current standing). (My first high school was like that.)

In the Utah drug testing story - in which the school unconstitutionally foists a drug test on students in extracurricular activities - school officials claim that students only passed the drug tests because they dipped the cup in the toilet and filled it with someone else's pee.

If the school has as many kids who are on drugs as officials claim, then wouldn't the urine from the toilet also be drug-laden? Damn, talk about some really bad reasoning by the school.

Schools aren't always known for great reasoning skills.

(Source: http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_9598157)