Jeweler faces a different kind of ring

In apparent retaliation for the weakening of right-wing hegemony, I was rousted out of bed this morning by another hang-up phone call.

I could just see some moron thrashing about their office or living room like a baby, cursing "libs", smashing flowerpots, and angrily spewing saliva while they frantically dial my number.

Until very recently (like a few weeks ago) I would have complained about this phone call here but not done anything about it - except maybe photograph the house or business where the call came from. For decades now, the policy of both the phone company and local law enforcement has been to do nothing, so I couldn't do much either.

But this is the 2009 Tim they're dealing with - not the 1988 Tim. So I traced the call and called 'em right back. When a man answered, I mashed the keypad of my phone with my hand and flooded him with a cacophony of high-pitched touch tones.

Oh, did I commit phone harassment? Well, obviously the phone harassment I've suffered is legal, because the authorities don't do anything about it - so I'm assuming it's legal for me to call the harassers right back.

Later I looked up the number and found that it belongs to a jewelry store a couple miles away.

These assholes didn't think I'd fight back, did they? Before the call, they were probably saying to themselves, "Ha ha, he's just going to write up an entry about how we called him, and we'll just do the same thing again later."

But ask the man whose ears are ringing now who got the last laugh this time.

You fuck with me, and I respond in kind.