Animals ruin clothes ('Sesame Street' Wednesday)

"This is the glutton...who ate my last button!"

You had to think into the deepest recesses of your childhood to recall that one, didn't you?

That line was so memorable, but it was probably squeezed out of your memory when your school years broke you down. Happened to me, happens to everyone.

It was part of this animated '70s 'Sesame Street' sketch in which animals ruined a man's clothes using assorted hilarious methods:



I briefly thought of that segment in 8th grade when a teacher launched a tirade about our alleged "gluttony" (which by the school's definition probably meant expecting to get lunch at all). But all I could remember was that the skit featured a glutton. I couldn't remember the context.

Lately, I've been growing desperate because my underpants have all been growing holes at an alarming rate. I wonder if there's gluttons hiding in the washing machine. Or maybe it's time for another line in that cartoon:

"Here's the Great Danes...who chewed up my Hanes!"