Have no fear, the March ish is here!

It's time to march into March! The March issue of The Last Word is now available, and this ish discusses a failed TV ratings stunt to ruin our town, Kroger bags that rip, people shoplifting playing cards and setting off fireworks at stores, Hardee's food getting wasted, and more!

So point your pooper here...

https://www.scribd.com/document/449191509/The-Last-Word-3-2020

If that doesn't work, bip on over here...

http://bunkerblast.info/lastword/lw2003.pdf

Donald Trump is terrified of Bernie Sanders

Massie opposes anti-lynching bill

Our far-right congressmoron Thomas Massie can now be rightly labeled as an unashamed racist.

For 100 years, Congress has tried to pass a bill against lynching. Recently, the Senate finally approved a bill. Today, the House passed its version of the bill by a stunning 410 to 4.

Guess who one of the 4 who voted against it was?

That's right, folks. Thomas Massie.

Massie said outlawing lynching would endanger free speech. Seriously, he said that.

Just resign already, Massie.

Cold Spring adopts fairness ordinance

Now I've seen everything.

Cold Spring is arguably the birthplace of the alt-right, and has been infamously dominated by its conservative institutions, both public and private. Despite this, the city has just voted 4 to 1 to become one of only 19 cities in Kentucky with a fairness ordinance.

This is actually quite impressive if you're aware of just how conservative Cold Spring is.

Special election tomorrow

For those unawares, there's a special election for a Kentucky House seat in my district tomorrow. The district covers roughly the northern half of Campbell County.

I no longer have the patience or physical energy to write much detail about it, but I need to note it here. The Republican candidate is as bizarre as one might expect. She has taken an unusual interest in a proposed convention of states to amend the Constitution - a right-wing cause celebre to try to bypass public opinion and the usual amendment process. On her business filings, the Republican candidate lists her home address as Falmouth, which is well outside the district. For this election, however, she claims to live at an address in Bellevue that apparently does not even exist. I checked online real estate maps and records, and that address cannot be found. The maps and records just skip over that house number.

Republican appointees are of course trying to cheat outright. The GOP-dominated Campbell County Board of Elections moved numerous polling locations to stifle turnout. Republican cheating has worn mighty thin, and it continues unchecked.

I probably won't write about this election again unless something else unusual happens - which it often does.

Tennessee GOP introduces "fake news" resolution

Right-wing legislators would be a laugh-out-loud riot if they didn't enact laws that intentionally cause harm to real people - and if they didn't introduce resolutions like this that make a mockery of their constituents.

Republican legislators in Tennessee have put forth a resolution to declare CNN and the Washington Post "fake news" because their coverage of the Trump regime isn't positive enough. This is especially absurd regarding CNN, as that network has lurched so far to the right lately.

The resolution by State Rep. Micah Van Huss calls for Tennessee "to recognize CNN and The Washington Post as fake news and condemn them for denigrating our citizens."

The only entity denigrating Tennesseeans is the GOP. They do it by installing such laughable public officials as this.

The resolution whines that commentators at each outlet have likened Trump's followers to a cult. Well, Donald Trump's followers do not represent the people of Tennessee. Trump only got 1.5 million votes in a state with 4.1 million registered voters, so even in one of his best states, a majority aren't on board with his fascism.

Much of the media seems singularly dedicated to advancing right-wing causes, so it's hard for me to keep a straight face when someone cries that it has a liberal bias.

(Source: https://wreg.com/news/tennessee-rep-files-resolution-to-declare-cnn-washington-post-fake-news)

ICE defies law in courthouse arrests

California has a new law requiring a judicial warrant to make immigration arrests inside courthouses. But laws are just damn pieces of paper (to use Bush's phrase) to Immigration and Customs Enforcement.

On Tuesday, ICE arrested 2 people at a northern California courthouse - in defiance of state law. Criminal justice experts said this raid undermines state and local autonomy and actually weakens public safety. ICE issued a smug statement to the contrary.

ICE's heavy-handed conduct is yet another example of "states' rights for me, not for thee." The right-wingers are always talking about how they support local autonomy, but when the rubber meets the road, we find out their claim is roo gas.

(Source: https://apnews.com/56303dd4fea7b23d9375c1400d997364)

Far Right mass shootings in Germany

America isn't the only place where the Far Right has inspired deadly violence.

Yesterday, a gunman shot and killed 9 people in a series of mass shootings around Frankfurt, Germany. Authorities said today that the gunman was part of the Far Right. Most of the victims were Turkish, and the attacks appear to have been a hate crime.

National prosecutors are rightly treating the attacks as a case of domestic terrorism.

Washington Post details Bloomberg's history of offensive comments

An article in today's Washington Post details "Meow Mix Mike" Bloomberg's history of offensive remarks. The Post allows free access to only a limited number of articles per month, but if you have a subscription or have enough articles left, you can find it here...

https://www.washingtonpost.com/graphics/2020/politics/michael-bloomberg-women

There have been numerous lawsuits blaming Bloomberg for a culture of sexual harassment within his company. In one instance, Bloomberg discovered that a woman who worked at his business was pregnant, so he reportedly declared, "Kill it!" Then Bloomberg began whining about all the women in his company who had a maternity-related status.

In another incident, Bloomberg launched a tirade against a female employee who couldn't find a nanny. In full view of other employees, Bloomberg allegedly thundered, "It's a fucking baby! All it does is eat and shit! It doesn't know the difference between you and anyone else! All you need is some black who doesn't have to speak English to rescue it from a burning building!"

In an effort to hide what went on in the workplace, Bloomberg has also enforced nondisclosure agreements on former employees - which would seem to be illegal.

You know, there's a reason Meow Mix Mike only got 0.12% in Iowa. Voters just aren't that into you, Mike. Maybe all the cable "news" channels are, but nobody else is.

Attack of the "moderates"

I don't have anything personal against the "moderates" running for the Democratic nomination - like Amy Klobuchar and Pete Buttigieg - but guess what? This is 2020. We should be way past the "moderate" stage now. (I'm not counting Meow Mix Mike as a "moderate", because he's so far removed from reality.)

This era should belong to progressive populists - not "moderates."

With Bernie Sanders winning 2 out of 2 states so far, I keep seeing people say things like, "But the moderates won voters who make over $150,000 a year."

If you're of normal means and insist on supporting a "moderate", I can't stop you. But what do we make of the fact that the "moderates" won more affluent voters? My answer: Who fucking cares?! Why should voters with more money commandeer a Democratic primary?

I'm not here to please people just because they have more money. To think it's important that "moderates" won the richest voters would be like if I was worried that donors to my former high school didn't vote for The Last Word as their favorite zine. Who cares? They're not The Last Word's audience!

It pisses me off to no end that a few affluent voters can have disproportionate influence in a presidential election - in both the primary and the general. We all know general elections are afflicted too, as Republicans do better among wealthier voters each time. But for the outsized influence of the very rich, we'd be living in a much freer society now. Contrast what we have with what we could have had, and it's pretty sad.

Sanders wins New Hampshire primary

Two states have had their primary so far. And Bernie Sanders has won both. There won't even be any initial doubts in New Hampshire like there were when Iowa had that big delay.

"Meow Mix Mike" Bloomberg did so poorly in New Hampshire that the website I'm reading lumps him under "other", which has only 1.69% right now.

Trump's acquittal dealt incalculable damage to our republic, but we have a real chance to stave off the right-wing media's inevitable engineering of this election.

Trump regime fails civics (again)

There's an article in the Washington Post about the Trump thugocracy's failure to certify the Equal Rights Amendment even though the ERA has been approved by the requisite 38 states.

The article says the House is trying to rectify this by removing the deadline for the ERA's ratification. It shouldn't even be necessary to do this, because the deadline is found nowhere in the text of the ERA. But the Trump regime says this won't count either, and that they'll still refuse to certify it. The article says of this move, "Even if the Senate cleared the measure, the Justice Department has ruled it would be unconstitutional."

Donald, you idiot, the Justice Department can't rule if something is unconstitutional. That's what courts do. That's not something the executive branch does. Besides, removing the deadline wouldn't be unconstitutional anyway.

#NeverBloomberg

Know who we're getting mighty fed up with? Michael Bloomberg. Although he's a Republican, the former New York City mayor is seeking the Democratic nomination for President. The billionaire oligarch has flooded the TV airwaves with ads taking credit for things he had absolutely nothing to do with. He can't run on his real record, which includes expanding stop-and-frisk and supporting the Iraq War. We call him Meow Mix Mike because he supported the Catfood Commission - a committee that endorsed the Tea Party's plan to slash Social Security.

Even after getting only 0.12% in Iowa, the media is still cheering him on. This despite a trail of offensive statements that anyone can verify. For example, Bloomberg once said, "If women wanted to be appreciated for their brains, they'd go to the library instead of to Bloomingdale's." When someone told me he said this, I thought they were mistaken and that it was actually a Trump quote. But no. It was Meow Mix Mike. Do an Internet search for it.

The last thing America needs is for a racist Tea Party billionaire who makes chauvinistic remarks to be the Democratic nominee for President. Of course we can do better, but the media is doing whatever it can to prevent that - his humiliating 0.12% in Iowa notwithstanding.

#NeverBloomberg. Never, ever, ever.

School records protected even after death

Several media outlets are suing to acquire the school disciplinary records of Connor Betts - the right-wing gunman in last year's mass shooting in Dayton, Ohio.

No. That's illegal. It's illegal not just under Ohio law but also under a federal law called the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act. Betts's school district has denied the media requests. FERPA is in force even after a former student dies.

The Dayton shooting was tragic - but Betts's school records aren't the sort of help we can use. What precedent would it set if news outlets could access his records?

I guess Heavy.com is going to have to make something up again.

Sadly, the federal law did not stop the Miami Herald from somehow receiving the school records of Trayvon Martin - the teenager fatally shot by a trigger-happy George Zimmerman - and blabbing them everywhere. It was illegal for the school to release the records, yet it did so anyway. The newspaper printed information from the records even though this information was completely irrelevant to the story.

Sanders wins Iowa caucus; Buttigieg given more delegates

Bernie Sanders has handily won Iowa in both the first and final rounds of caucusing - but Democratic Party bosses have opted to give Pete Buttigieg more delegates anyway.

Why are party panjandrums running roughshod over the Gray v. Sanders ruling? The answer is easy. The Democratic Leadership Council - the Republican wing of the Democratic Party - is trying to throw the November election by preventing the party's most electable candidate from being nominated. That way, the Democrats are more likely to lose to a disgraced Donald Trump, and the DLC can use that as an excuse to hand-pick a candidate in 2024 who is to the right of any of the party's major 2020 contenders. It's a vicious cycle.

The DLC has a victim fantasy that says that when the Democrats lose, it was because they were too far left. But the fact is that the Democrats do better when they have more progressive candidates.

Sanders has the best policies among the Democratic field, and is most electable. Yes, we'd all much rather have Buttigieg in the White House than Trump. Buttigieg would also be better than Michael Bloomberg, the joke of a candidate who the DLC really wants. Still, Sanders would be best by far, and Trump is unfit for the presidency. Everyone we know agrees with us on these things. But after Bill Clinton enacted 30 years of right-wing dream bills, the DLC doesn't have very far to fall.

Much has been made about the delay in releasing the results of the Iowa caucus, but the far more serious hold-up is the delay in America getting universal public healthcare. It's been at least 50 years since it was first proposed.

In the meantime, Bloomberg didn't win a single delegate - after getting only 0.12% of the Iowa vote. But you know it's coming, because party bosses are actively working for his campaign - which is particularly absurd because Bloomberg is a Republican.

Incidentally, I wrote most of the above before it was revealed that delegates for Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren were wrongly awarded to other candidates, and before it was discovered that 4chan encouraged Trump cultists to jam the phone line for reporting precinct results.

Captain Kangaroo goes Krogering

Today at Kroger, I saw a Captain Kangaroo look-alike.

ERA ratified, but Trump regime refuses to recognize it

This should be big news, but hardly anyone is covering it: A new constitutional amendment has just been ratified for the first time since 1992.

For decades, the popular Equal Rights Amendment had been waiting for ratification by the 38 states it needed to become part of the Constitution. Just days ago, Virginia became the 38th. Thus, the ERA is ratified. End of story.

There should be no ambiguity about it. I had been under the impression that the ERA had a time limit written into it, so it could never be effectively enacted if it wasn't ratified before the deadline. But now we know this is not true.

Nonetheless, the Trump regime - known for its lawlessness - is refusing to recognize the ERA's ratification. Trump's National Archives and Records Administration has declared that it would "take no action to certify the adoption of the Equal Rights Amendment." The reason is that the Trump regime opposes the amendment.

Uh, the President and his administration have no say in approving constitutional amendments. If enough states ratify the amendment, the administration is required to certify it and recognize it as the law of the land. Full stop.

Now 3 states are suing the federal government to try to force it to certify the ERA. Why aren't 38 states suing? Part of this is because some states that approved the ERA a long time ago now have corrupt Republicans as their attorney general, and they don't care about the Constitution. The Republicans have proven during the Trump impeachment that they have no respect for the Constitution - but I've known that for a long time.

As far as I'm concerned, the ERA is ratified and is now the law.

(Source: https://www.chron.com/news/us/article/Democratic-AGs-in-last-states-to-ratify-ERA-plan-15015680.php)

Duke wants yet another rate increase

Another electric rate increase???

After Duke Energy's recent increase in electric rates for northern Kentucky was rubber-stamped, this utility monopoly is already demanding yet another increase - this one by a staggering 16%.

Why? Just because.

(Source: https://www.rcnky.com/articles/2020/01/30/public-meeting-planned-proposed-duke-energy-rate-increase-16)

Have no fear, the February ish is here!

Feb wouldn't be Feb without the February issue of The Last Word! So let's Feb it up!

And how do we do that, dare you ask? By...bipping! Just joking! Rather, you can do that by leaning back, relaxing, and probing your proboscis with the latest ish - which talks about the devious plot to tear down a historic building for a Burger King, bubble gum cigarettes, comic books getting ruined by a leaky toilet, a 'Super Fuzz' retrospective, modern-day homesteading, and more!

So point your pooper here...

https://www.scribd.com/document/444681648/The-Last-Word-2-2020

If that doesn't work, point it here...

http://bunkerblast.info/lastword/lw2002.pdf

Connecticut lawmakers propose unit to fight right-wing violence

Listen up, Kentucky, because this is how it's done.

In 2017, authorities in Connecticut and nationwide reported a spike in what they called "bias crimes" - hate crimes motivated by race, religion, sexual orientation, or certain other factors. New legislation in Connecticut broadened protections from hate crimes, but some state legislators there say more needs to be done.

Lawmakers now want to create a new unit within the state police designed to fight against hate crimes and other right-wing violence. They want to be more proactive at identifying and investigating the sources of such terrorism. A press release said the new unit would "specialize in investigating far right extremist groups and individuals." Just by releasing that statement, legislators have done more to identify the problem than most other states do.

In the meantime, what are Kentucky lawmakers doing? The Kentucky GOP is instead trying to pass bathroom bills, anti-immigrant laws, and voter suppression measures - like anyone still gives a shit about their right-wing agenda.

(Source: https://www.courant.com/news/connecticut/hc-news-connecticut-csp-hate-crimes-20200122-vvirqerpevcvho3rrwg3ii4bh4-story.html)

January bunkeroo haul

Next time I go to an important family gathering, I'm bringing a gas mask!

Tonight, after a dinner with family members, we goed back to a family domicile to watch TV and be cool. While we were there, many silent but deadly bunker blasts were detected. I didn't notice most of them, but they reportedly went on all evening. The ones I did detect though were hilarious.

At first, it was agreed that these rock snakes had a canine source. But then the net was cast wider. Cries of accusation sprang up throughout the room. But no suspects were impeached for this high crime or misdemeanor.

St. Henry student accused of social media threats

Many media outlets intentionally do not cover terroristic threats or even actual violence in private schools as readily as they do for public schools. That is a matter of policy. Covering it conflicts with their aim of portraying private schools as perfect.

But they couldn't hide the fact that today, a 15-year-old student at St. Henry District High School - a Catholic school in Boone County - was arrested and accused of terroristic threatening for reportedly making threats on Snapchat. The threats included images of a pistol and knife.

In fact, he told police he had carried a pocketknife to school, and cops found a pocketknife in his locker.

He told authorities he made the threats because other students were harassing his pals. One thing is clear: Whether it was him or someone else, somebody precipitated this situation. This torpedoes a Bazooka hole through the media's unceasing claims of private school perfection.

Back when I went to Brossart, I heard about a student bringing a gun to school, and people made terroristic threats in paper form all the time. It cane nowhere near the media's threshold for coverage though, because there were no charges, as the offenders had a lot of money and clout.

Ohio cuts healthcare to give handouts to 1%

The Cincinnati Enquirer isn't exactly a progressive organ, but it took only one glance at the headlines on its website today to see how the Ohio GOP is robbing workers to give free Toy Money to the 1%.

One of the top headlines is: "You may soon be paying for Wyoming, Indian Hill students to attend private schools. Here's why."

The headline of another article reads: "Health-care cuts coming for 500,000-plus retired Ohio public employees."

These stories side by side speak volumes about Republicans' thirst for giving handouts to the 1%. It's about all you need to know about their priorities and their intent to harm workers.

Campbell County adopts Second Amendment resolution

Yesterday, Campbell County joined many other counties across Kentucky and the nation in passing a resolution supporting the Second Amendment, which safeguards the right to bear arms.

Spectacular! Now that Campbell County has proven it understands the Second Amendment, hopefully it will start to understand the rest of the Constitution too.

Take the First Amendment, for example, which the county has violated by prosecuting people over adult movies that are constitutionally protected.

Or the Fifth Amendment, which the county violated at least once - many years ago - by prosecuting a defendant twice for the same crime because it didn't get the conviction it wanted the first time.

County officials also have a lot to learn about the constitutional responsibility to fully fund public education.

Why did officials express support for the Second Amendment but nothing else in the Constitution? The Second Amendment is the law of the land, and in no way should it be abridged. But the same is true of the rest of the Constitution. In this democratic republic, we don't get to pick and choose which parts of the Constitution we want to obey - like it's a smorgasbord.

For a county that has historically been very weak on civil liberties and economic security, why pick just one part of the Constitution to support? What does it say about the county if it doesn't support the First Amendment or a number of other constitutional provisions that protect our liberty?

West Virginia tries to annex Virginia county

It's nice to know West Virginia Republicans waste time on ridiculous campaigns like this.

Republicans in the West Virginia Senate have approved a resolution urging the annexation of Frederick County, Virginia. Apparently, this would leave the city of Winchester - an independent city that is not officially part of Frederick County - as a part of Virginia completely surrounded by West Virginia.

This effort sounds like a cash grab to finance Republican mismanagement. Frederick County actually has a higher average income than most West Virginia counties, and with 90,000 people, it would be a cash cow. The West Virginia GOP has managed the state so incompetently that they think they need to annex new territory to recoup the economic losses.

But Frederick County doesn't want to join West Virginia - precisely because of Republicans' fiscal mismanagement.

Delta flight dumps fuel on playground

Here's more of the news the right-wing media seems to lose.

Today, a Delta Airlines flight that had just taken off from Los Angeles dumped jet fuel on an elementary school playground - as children were present. Thirty children had to be treated or hospitalized.

Will the media cover it? Of course not.

The airlines received a taxpayer-funded bailout just to do shit like this.

Warplanes bomb people around the world. But Delta wages a war of its own against America's children.

(Source: https://breaking911.com/breaking-30-children-treated-after-flight-dumps-fuel-on-elementary-school-in-l-a)

NKU residence halls close because of structural problems

Looks like the 2020s are gonna be another decade of stupid at Northern Kentucky University! Super!

Students who live on campus at 2 residence halls are being forced to move right away because the buildings have deteriorated so much that they must be closed. A third building must close in June.

These buildings are less than 30 years old, and they've already gotten so bad that they must be demolished.

NKU squandered an untold amount of money moving its sports program to Division I and buying a bulk subscription to a far-right newspaper, but it wouldn't even properly maintain its residence halls? For years, the school has been poormouthing about how we couldn't have this or couldn't have that because there was no money, yet it wastes money on ideological projects or other stuff it doesn't need.

A person bunkerooed on Christmas Eve

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas, and it wouldn't be Christmas without a big ol' nasty bunker blast.

Yesterday, I went to an important family gathering. Guess what was detected? An air biscuit. A trouser sneeze. A rock snake. A backdoor breeze.

The scent of a silent-but-deadly briefly loomed. It was initially believed that it had a canine source, but this theory was quickly discarded.

Have no fear, the January ish is here!

Put your rear in gear and drink some beer, for the January ish is already here!

The January edition of The Last Word talks about all sorts of splendid topics, among them...

• Dump trucks throwing fast food litter around.

• Candy that tastes like borax.

• Wine getting knocked over at Meijer.

• Weird Dungeons & Dragons rules.

• People carving up tables in 6th grade.

• A dumb GeoCities website about bubble gum.

• My high school thinking Wonder Woman was porn.

• A lost Peanuts comic.

• Ridiculous mail order commercials.

So point your pooper here...

https://www.scribd.com/document/440737702/The-Last-Word-1-2020

If that doesn't work, you can find it here...

http://bunkerblast.info/lastword/lw2001.pdf

Trump impeached

Another historic day falls on the 18th of its respective month - just like the Plop Lecture and my birthday.

Donald Trump got impeached this evening - widening smiles all across the country. You may know this is only the third time in America's history a President has been impeached. In fact, Trump is the first to be seeking reelection at the time of impeachment. I have a feeling that won't end well for him.

Trump's impeachment blasts a Bazooka hole through the Facebook meme that says he can't be impeached because he "won landed holdings" or some bullshit reason like that. Property requirements for voting are unconstitutional. Plus, even if Trump won all 50 states and D.C., winning shouldn't make any difference as long as he committed impeachable offenses.

It's a certainty that Mitch McConnell will intentionally botch Trump's Senate trial. McConnell is an obstructionist.

Presidential impeachments are historically rare, but this is actually the second impeachment during the time I've lived in my current apartment. Some would argue it's because there's been a lot of lousy Presidents in modern times. But Bill Clinton wasn't the worst. Several Presidents committed impeachable offenses but were never even close to being impeached. Articles of impeachment have been introduced against 5 of the last 6 Republican Presidents, but for some of the worst offenders, the effort made it no further.

Some who support impeaching Trump say this is a sad, solemn day. But I'm happy. Trump earned impeachment. During much of this process, Adam Schiff had a look on his face like he was enjoying it. I don't blame him one bit. Trump might not be removed before the election, but impeaching him sure feels great!