Friday, January 31, 2014

Keystone XL doublespeak

Today the State Department released its long-awaited report on whether the job-killing Keystone XL pipeline will worsen climate change.

According to the press, "the U.S." says the report "found" that the pipeline won't heighten climate change. But if you look at the report, that's not what it says. The study actually says this poisonous boondoggle will increase annual greenhouse gas emissions by 1.3 million to 27.4 million megatons of carbon dioxide equivalents.

The State Department contractor reviewing this project has ties to TransCanada - the company behind the pipeline - so anything they put out that supports the pipeline should be automatically rejected anyway.

Lawn Chair Quarterback: "H...H...H..."

Tim describes how cool people behave when they get a hemorrhoid...

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

When Pete Seeger fought Congress

Following the death of folk singer and Occupy Wall Street participant Pete Seeger, we'd like to look back on how Seeger fought back against an out-of-control Congress.

Congress of today is awash in partisan obstructionism and the culture of corruption. But in 1955, it wasn't that much better. That year, Seeger was called to testify before the hated House Un-American Activities Committee - but he refused to name names. As a result, he was indicted in 1957 for contempt of Congress.

Contempt of Congress. Think of how silly that is. Congress holds America in contempt, yet they're afraid of being contempted themselves. Wikipedia defines contempt of Congress as "the act of obstructing the work of the United States Congress or one of its committees." Then shouldn't Republicans in the current Congress be charged?

Moreover, according to Wikipedia, the President can't pardon anyone charged with contempt of Congress, since it's not considered an "offense against the United States." Of course it isn't, since Congress itself has so many members engaged in a Tea Party war against America.

After Seeger's indictment, the government prohibited him from even leaving southern New York. He went on to be convicted in 1961 and sentenced to 10 years. But the following year, a court overturned his conviction because the indictment was hopelessly flawed.

Pete Seeger stood up to Congress. Today, more people remember Pete Seeger than most of those in Congress who persecuted him. I have nothing but contempt for Tea Party members of Congress, and I too will fight them.

Friday, January 24, 2014

New attempt at GOP voter suppression in Cincinnati

When the apartheid Supreme Court illegally gutted the longstanding Voting Rights Act last year, some folks suggested a workaround that would apply the preclearance portion of the Voting Rights Act to every state, not just a few. But others argued that this would divert resources from states that really need to be watched.

It may be a moot point, because a scuzz-a-luzz Congress is unlikely to fix it at all, but this story bolsters the argument for nationwide preclearance. Ohio wasn't subjected to preclearance, but it's clear that it should be, judging by what's going on in Cincinnati's Hamilton County. Republican county officials want to move the county's early voting station from downtown to a different location miles to the west. It would take an hour to get there by bus.

One of the Tea Party nobodies on the Hamilton County Board of Elections tried justifying the move, saying, "Our community is largely a community of people who drive cars." I get it now. In Team Tyranny's world, it's pay to play. In order to vote, you gotta afford a car. That right there is a violation of the Constitution's ban on poll taxes.

The Hamilton County Board of Elections is split on the proposal, but a tie would be broken by Ohio's right-wing Secretary of State Jon Husted. Because the state gets to run everything.

Cincinnati City Council has formally opposed the plan. The only member present who didn't oppose it was Republican Amy Murray, who is best known for trying to shut down Occupy Cincinnati because she disagreed with it.

If the county's move is approved, the city should arrest county officials who participate in carrying it out.

Meanwhile, Ohio languishes at the statewide level, as the GOP Taliban steps up its war on women - even after running on a "limited government" pledge.


Lawn Chair Quarterback: "Matt Bevin Looks Like Bert"

Tim talks about how a right-wing Kentucky politician resembles a Sesame Street character...

Portland tries shaking down Occupy protester

This is exactly the sort of fascism that justifies Occupy expanding its activities even more.

In 2011, police in Portland, Oregon, sprayed a young woman with pepper spray for daring to participate in Occupy Portland. She later sued the city, but - unlike a majority of other Occupy court cases, which Occupy usually wins - she lost.

Now the city is trying to bill her over $7,000 for the city's legal fees. She earns her livelihood as a janitor and doesn't have that kind of money. Plus, the city is trying to charge her interest if she doesn't pay.

Do you honestly think I'd pay it? Why should a victim of police brutality pay the city's legal fees?

America was made great by revolutionaries - not by people who silently comply, or by corporations that make their zillions off everyone else's labor, or by political hacks who happily do Wall Street's dirty work. If Portland prosecutors hate the Constitution so much, they're free to move to Singapore.


Thursday, January 23, 2014

Bellevue! Highland Heights! Lockland! It's a great place to start!

Me being the amazing oracle that I am, I've posted 69 local Roads Scholarin' photos and videos covering the last 3 months of 2013!

First off is this 3-part set from the Cincinnati roadmeet back in October...

There's also a bonus batch of photos that'll make you peep and weep...

With this, 2013 - a year of government shutdowns and perhaps unprecedented media mind-bending - winks into history.

Team Tyranny taking credit for my ideas

Notice how in the rare instances that the Tea Party seems to make a timid foray into sanity, they always wait until it's too late. It's like how they waited until now to complain about the NSA spying - which they supported when Bush was in power.

Now the Northern Kentucky Tea Party is trying to take credit for my ideas. They're urging folks to support a bill in Kentucky that would stop local governments from infringing on law-abiding people owning knives. Hate to tell you this, BTPers, but this bill was my idea. Same goes for the bills that would limit eminent domain powers of greedy corporations. I've been demanding bills that were even stronger than this for years. But the Tea Party waits until after developers and utility firms have already carried out land grabs all over the state before claiming to support bills that are much more modest than what I want. I support revoking corporations' eminent domain powers altogether.

They attack Common Core from the right, after I've opposed it from the left, right from the giddy-up. They've even latched on to the bill to restore voting rights of nonviolent felons who have served their time - another bill I've supported for years. The Tea Party waited until the bill was too popular to ignore before claiming support for it.

What's next? Are they going to fight against school uniforms like I've actively done since 1986? Are they going to announce a war against Pathway Family Center, 5 years after I helped get it shut down?

If the Tea Party gave a solid shit about any of these issues, they had plenty of time to tackle them before now.

If you read the Northern Kentucky Tea Party's latest release, you'd think it was straight out of the pages of a Last Word from 15 years ago. The Tea Party's fleeting attempt to co-opt my ideas may be the only smart thing they've ever done. I wish they hadn't, because the Tea Party has a record of failing at most of the things they try. Maybe that's why they did it.

SurveyUSA lolz

If you want some laughs regarding electoral politics, peep this SurveyUSA meltdown from 2008, and contrast it with the way things eventually turned out...

The developments after that poll serve SurveyUSA right after they handed the "election" to Ernie Fletcher in 2003.

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Bob McDonnell indicted

Remember just a few milliseconds ago when far-right Virginia Gov. Bob McDonnell was a rising Republican star? Though term-limited, he managed to enact right-wing ideas like lowering the gas tax while increasing the sales tax. This encouraged people to buy inefficient vehicles and waste gas.

Now McDonnell and his wife Maureen have been indicted in federal court for illegally accepting gifts and expensive vacations from a businessman who sought preferential treatment.

With this, the GOP's 2 stars of the 2009 election - Bob McDonnell and Chris Christie - are now both a political shambles due to scandals. Couldn't have happened to a funnier party!

AFP thinks I'm important

How do you know when you've got Team Tyranny running scared? When they add you to their Google+ list.

Americans for Prosperity is a flatulent force backed by the right-wing Koch brothers that helped engineer the Tea Party's 2010 electoral jailbreak.

I'm such a serious threat to their right-wing machine that they're now watching me. Last night I got an e-mail titled, "Americans For Prosperity is now following bandit957 on Google+." What's funny is that I don't even use Google+ for that much, let alone brag of the fact that I have an account there.

Ever since I helped get the Pathway Family Center cult shut down, the Far Right's reaction to me has been like Fred Flintstone's legs spinning before he darts away in fear.

Monday, January 20, 2014

Bill Gates look-alike sighted

Today - when I was going home from an Occupy event downtown - I saw a Bill Gates look-alike walking up Elm Street.

Friday, January 17, 2014

7-Cent Joe one of 12 votes against voter bill

Right now in Kentucky, there's a very popular bill that would let the Kentucky Constitution be amended to allow people convicted of most nonviolent felonies to vote once they've served their sentence. This is not for serial criminals. This is for people who made a mistake and have paid their debt to society.

The bill passed the Kentucky House yesterday by a smashing 82 to 12. Guess who one of the 12 who voted against it was? Here's 3 guesses: Joe Fischer, 7-Cent Joe, or Work-for-Less Joe.

Joe Fischer. Obstructing progress for 8 terms.

Lawn Chair Quarterback: "Squirrel Appreciation Day"

Tim celebrates Squirrel Appreciation Day by storing food in his mouth...

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Kentucky GOPer gets 27 months

One of many scandals involving Republican officials in Kentucky now appears to be finally drawing to a close.

Former Kentucky Agriculture Commissioner Richie Farmer has now been sentenced to 27 months in the slammer for squandering taxpayer funds on a slew of personal expenses. Farmer also has to pay restitution of $120,500.

Farmer had used public funds to buy refrigerators and other goodies for himself.

With this scandal and many others damaging the Kentucky GOP's prospects, it's easy to forget how babyish Farmer acted in 2011 when he was the Republican nominee for lieutenant governor on David Williams's ill-fated ticket. He kept trying to make campaign staffers reimburse him for his junk food purchases and kept whining when he didn't have the right kind of candy. He reportedly threw tantrums when he didn't get reimbursed.

Do you expect Farmer to serve his entire sentence? I don't. He's a Republican, don't ya know.

The stink of waste still looms over the office of Kentucky Agriculture Commissioner as its current Tea Party occupant - Jamie Comer - pissed away taxpayer dollars on Crowne Plaza stays and steak dinners.


Gum for the Kroger!

Today at Kroger, a young woman bubbled.

Politician who tortured stepson plans run as Republican

Remember Steven Maynard? He was the Third Way candidate for Governor of Kentucky back in 1995 and finished dead last in the Democratic primary. This despite his statement that "if you were my opponent, you would have the fear of God in you." Maynard, who lived in Inez at the time, was later sent to prison because he shackled his teenage stepson in a tiny concrete bathroom for over a year, sodomized him with a pair of needle nose pliers, and made him drink bleach and ammonia.

Maynard was sentenced to 20 years - but of course he didn't serve his whole sentence. People serve more time for minor weed violations.

Now he's back - as a Tea Party Republican. His Facebook page is full of boilerplate Tea Party garbage - mostly fundraising pleas for Rand Paul and our unpopular congressman Thomas Massie. Maynard even has a photo of himself schmoozing with Massie, and he's always praising Massie for his "true principles." Maynard describes his own political views as "Republican National Committee" and constantly reposts GOP items. His friends list reads like a Who's Who of Republican politics in Kentucky.

And now - if Rand Paul can't or won't run for Senate again in 2016 - Maynard is the frontrunner for the Republican nomination. No kidding. Maynard has already announced his Senate candidacy.

The Kentucky GOP is now officially the party of Steve Maynard. That's where the Republican Party of Kentucky is at now. A man who tortured his stepson for over a year is now among the party's leading politicians.

Steve Maynard fever! Catch it!

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Obamacare enrollment soars; media silent

Hey, I found a way to get the right-wing media to shut up about the Affordable Care Act. Just sign up for it. Then it'll be a success, and The Media won't talk about it anymore. That's what's happening now.

Then again, the Tea Party is getting shriller than ever. You know, it really is something to see when the Tea Party goes on Facebook and starts lecturing people who get Obamacare subsidies to work 80 hours a week instead of 50 because the Tea Party is afraid of their wealth being "redistributed" to them in the form of subsidies. I guess they forgot how John McCain's numbers cratered when he started grumbling about "redistribution."

The Tea Party has some nerve telling people who work at minimum wage jobs to go back to the days before the ACA when they had to pay more for worse insurance.

Right-wing court guts 'Net neutrality

Right-wing judicial activism rules the roost in our federal courts, and this ruling is yet another example of how right-wing federal judges make up laws as they go along.

Today, the U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit issued a ruling that struck down the FCC's 'Net neutrality regulations. The court says the FCC overstepped its statutory authority.

What's the point of even having an FCC if it's not allowed to do its job?

Because of this ruling, ISP's can now make websites pay for preferential access. They can even block sites - which Zoomtown does anyway.

Not surprisingly, the ruling was inspired by the NAMBLA-backed 1996 Telecommunications Act, which weakened the FCC's power to rein in telcoms' greed.

The states have a choice: They can either act to reestablish 'Net neutrality - or they can surrender like a bunch of cowards, like they did when the '96 telcom law passed.

What's a matter, states? Are you chicken? Brrrrrokk brok brok brok brok brok! Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrokk brok brok brok brok brok!


Dogs falsely blamed for bunker blast

This is a serious current events blog, so what can be more serious and current than flatulence?

On Sunday, at an important family gathering, the scent of an SBD bunkeroo was detected. The dogs were blamed, though I have a feeling the air biscuit was human-generated.

Everyone blames the dog, don't they?

Saturday, January 11, 2014

Have no fear, the January ish is here!

Our 22nd year. Our 472nd ish.

The January issue of The Last Word is now permeating the joint, and this edition discusses these things...

• A recent road trip down south.

• The right-wing bigotry and humiliation of past school villains.

• The politics of mapmaking.

• More hilarious hotel reviews.

• A stinky situation at a Georgia bar.

• The decline of a once-great radio.

You're gonna peep, and you're gonna beep...

Friday, January 10, 2014

Obama cracks down on "zero tolerance" fascism

Be still my beating heart, we finally have a President who wants to lower the boom on schools that impose right-wing "zero tolerance" policies!

While previous regimes in the White House have championed school uniforms and other far-right tyranny, President Obama isn't quite as patient with this oppression. The Obama administration is asking school officials nationwide to curb "zero tolerance" fascism and stop bringing in police to arrest students for minor infractions of school rules.

One of few things I disagree with in this story is Attorney General Eric Holder's statement that "zero tolerance" is "well-intentioned." Um, no. It isn't. "Zero tolerance" was designed largely to keep victims of school harassment from fighting back. It was put in place by very, very evil school officials who aimed to do very, very evil things to America's youth. Let's face it: There's evil out there, and it's our job to tell it like it is.

It's a mystery why it took presidential action to rein in "zero tolerance" when you'd think a few lawsuits would have been sufficient. I guess our right-wing schools have everyone cowed so much that they're afraid to sue - for fear of retaliation by school officials.


Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Tea Party opposes domestic violence bill

Any time the legislature in your state goes back to work and you read through the list of new bills, you always find some that are common sense, some that are nutty, some that are nutty that everyone acts like are common sense, and some that don't do much of anything. But Kentucky's H.B. 8 is common sense.

H.B. 8 would beef up the laws on domestic violence orders to protect dating partners. Right now, Kentucky laws on domestic violence orders are tragically weak, as dating partners can't even win such orders. This bill would help remedy this gap.

Who could possibly be against this bill? If you think nobody could oppose it, then I assume you've never heard of the Tea Party. The "values voters" of yesteryear have donned Colonial-era hats and rebranded themselves once again, as if you didn't know.

The loldumb Northern Kentucky Tea Party is urging followers to call up lawmakers and tell them to vote against H.B. 8. They don't really give any reason why they're against it. They just are.

Considering the disproportionate number of domestic violence perpetrators in the Tea Party, I guess it shouldn't be much of a surprise.

Saturday, January 4, 2014

Ben Franklin! You discovered celebrity look-alikes!

It's hilarious enough when you see people who resemble celebrities from the modern era such as Eddie Rabbitt or Pee Wee Herman. But sometimes you see someone who resembles a historic figure from hundreds of years ago. I've been informed that a Benjamin Franklin look-alike was sighted at a local post office.

Friday, January 3, 2014

Lawn Chair Quarterback: "Tea Party Tax"

In the latest LCQ, Tim talks about how the Tea Party is causing him to pay $55 more each month to cover the rent.

Incidentally, the Tea Party - which claims to be for lower taxes - is directly responsible for recent sales tax hikes in Ohio and Indiana. Now they want Kentucky to follow suit by increasing the statewide sales tax to 7%, an idea supported by far-right State Rep. Joe Fischer.

Thursday, January 2, 2014

Right-wing Kentucky lawmaker accused of misusing finances

The year is only 2 days old, and already we've caught the year's first major scandal in the Kentucky GOP.

State Rep. Ben Waide is a far, far right-wing extremist from Madisonville in western Kentucky. The Republican legislator is known for his remarks attacking evolution. "The theory of evolution is not science. Darwin made it up," he once declared.

Now Waide is being sued for allegedly misusing his company's finances. The plaintiffs - 2 of Waide's business partners - claim Waide has been abusing the company credit card to illegally buy campaign ads and go on vacation in St. Louis to get massages. Waide is also accused of using the credit card to buy gas to go to legislative meetings. The state reimburses lawmakers for fuel, and Waide allegedly just pocketed the reimbursement.

Waide may also face a complaint with the Kentucky Registry of Elections Finance.

Ben Waide's apparent abuse of his company credit card has gone on since 2007. There may be as much as $200,000 involved.

Waide is being represented by Todd P'Pool, the right-wing County Attorney of Hopkins County who was the Tea Party candidate for Kentucky Attorney General in 2011. As county attorney, P'Pool himself wasted public money on a day spa. P'Pool claims the suit against Waide is nothing but a political attack.

This is the party that everyone acts like is owed control of the Kentucky House come November?